"two lovers in your heart"

"two lovers in your heart"
written sleepily after a spell by jake kilroy.

sometimes, there are two lovers in your heart.
sometimes, they're the acrobats of the bed.
sometimes, they read the newspaper together.
sometimes, they rub their feet and that's enough.
sometimes.

and then comes the sweaty nights when the radio breaks
and only plays the songs they never want to hear
and they fight until they swallow their own throat
and they cough up bits of their insides from screaming
and they can't stop crying until they're dizzy.

maybe they still talk in their sleep.
maybe they want to hear more.
maybe they think out loud then.
maybe that's why they love.
maybe that's why anyone does.

so they'll cook each other breakfast in bed.
so they'll kiss the other cheek when it's turned.
so they'll laugh the hardest after grieving.
so they'll read their letters to each other.
they can be so perfect, truly, finally.

or be sick to their stomach forever.

whatever you want love to be,
it will,
whether you have it or not.