"better luck"

"better luck"

written with a drunkard's hope by jake kilroy.

with barely a scratch

on this double-headed coin i call a conscience,

i bounded through the south like a carpetbagger

back for forgiveness with an insider tip-off about the rapture.

i bought low life and sold high praise

before returning home to a wife

who thought i was only 

gone for the weekend.

you could be loved anywhere, i tell myself,

shaving and dabbing blood

in a ramshackle cottage

my grandfather built

with hands that worked the war machines.

meanwhile, you could be a god

if your hands and moral compass

weren’t shaky from drink.

but that takes courage.

that takes honesty.

that takes away from a spirited demise

and you’ve only got one life to ride into the wilderness.

better luck next time.